Depression

There is no immunity; mental illness can come out of nowhere and affect anyone at any time.

These are some of the extracts of ย what the former NHS director of Mental Health recently shared about her battle with depression that left her suicidal within 10 days and admitted in an inpatient ward for 12 weeks. You may think that with her background in the field, she would would never have had to walk this journey, yet there she was in hospital relying on the support of her former subordinates.

“I’m sharing this awful picture and my story to help increase understanding of the impact of mental illness and to celebrate my recovery,” she said.

I lost my mind, lost my self esteem, lost my pride, lost my sense of who I am, lost my confidence, lost my job and my income, lost my driving license and my independence.

‘So so so far from who I normally am; a confident, competent, extrovert, professional, independent woman. This is what mental illness has the power to do.

Please don’t pity me for having a mental illness. Instead, wish me well for my discharge and full recovery,’ she added.

‘But I am slowly picking up the pieces… like a smashed vase, glueing itself together in to a beautiful mosaic. I will be strong again. I will be OK.’

I never knew the extremes depression or any other form of mental illness can push you until someone so close to me was diagnosed with the same. And because their struggle and pain isn’t visible, we are quick to think that they are not trying hard to get better or that they exaggerating their situation or even just seeking attention!! In my case, i was in total denial, i could not come to terms with the fact that the person i was looking at had become the exact opposite of the sweet, happy individual i knew who was so full of life.

It took lots of reading for me to try to understand the struggle and in that spirit for the next 7 – 10 days, i will be sharing some information about mental health; the causes, signs & symptoms, complications and treatment. Hopefully someone else will benefit from it.

Together we can promote Mental Health awareness and fight the Stigma attached to it.

 

What is your favorite Martin Luther King Quote?

Here is to all the people who have bend their backs so that that their own can walk straight 🍻🍸🍹. You are our unsang heroes!!

There are people who; if they paddled canoes to reach their destination, they would rather see you swim to the finish line, wading off aligators, crocodiles and other vultures to prove the weight of every swirl they made.
But you my friends, you are exceptional. If your responsibility was to harvest plants, you would rather that your own start with packing or transportation so that they don’t bleed from the thorns.
You are living testimonies of one of my favorite quotes “WE BURY SO OTHERS DON’T HAVE TO BURY”



Happy Martin Luther King Day
What is your favorite Martin Luther King Quote?โ€‹

The Blessing

As parents you have the ability to impact your children like no one else can. Without your approval and validation, the child will feel a void. Every child needs the blessing of their parents. Many adults suffer today from self-esteem, working all the time, trying to prove that they are good enough, all because of their parents lack of affirmation.

The parents never told them, “I am proud of you”. They are struggling to measure up to gain this approval especially from their fathers. Parents have the ability to give their children something no one else can. Other people may tell them how special they are, but when you tell them it carries a whole new weight.

As a parent you have the God-given authority to bless your child. Every time you say i am proud of you, i love you, you are beautiful, God releases strength, value, confidence, security. Those are not just nice words. It’s what the scripture calls the blessing. You are propelling your child towards their destiny.

With our busy lives, its easy to be side tracked, or to be at odds with our children, we tell ourselves that when i get extra time on my hands i will spend time with them, when they straighten up i will be nicer, or you automatically believe they know you are proud of them because you told them five years back, but they need to hear it again and again.

Don’t withhold your love, your blessing your affection. You may not have received this from your parents; they were not there when you were growing up, or may be they were there but all they did was correct you, tell you what you are doing wrong, they didn’t show you affection, make you feel valuable don’t let that negative cycle get past to the next generation.

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You can be the difference maker, you can set a new standard. Start blessing your children. Start calling out their seeds of greatness, telling them what they can become, prophesying their future. Let them know you are their number one fan.

Without your blessing, your children will struggle in areas they didn’t have to struggle in. There is a reason people are insecure, promiscuous, overly competitive, many time the root cause may be traced back to never getting affirmation from their parents. It’s not too late to reach out as parent. Your validation of your child’s accomplishments, milestones, could be the turning point in their lives. It can put an end to the issues they have been dealing with. It can bring a wholeness in their lives.

A parent holds a blessing that is a strategic piece to our puzzle. There is a reason people are secure, confident, valuable, it has a lot to do with the blessing of their parents. If a young lady doesn’t get affection from her father, she will go on looking for it from other men. It’s from the fathers that little girls draw a benchmark of what love is. They all look at them as their heroes who can do right about anything. They will let other men treat them the way you treated them. They no doubt experience their mother’s love but you are their first boyfriend. It all starts with you. It is all going to be compared to the love you show her.

That is why as fathers, you not only have to treat your wives with honor and respect but you also have to treat your daughters as queens. You are setting the tone for how she will allow other people to treat her. If you are harsh, rude, condescending, you are selling her mediocrity.

Let us set a legacy. This is what you are passing down, more than your money, your values, your principles. That is what is going to live on. Model excellence, model integrity. give your children a blessing, let them know that they were made in the image of God, that they have seeds of greatness in the inside.

J Osteen

My deepest sympathies with you my dear friend.

I am really sorry you are going through this at such a tender age.
For a person who has experienced loss of people dear to me before (a mother, father and a sister) you would think i would know what to say. But i don’t.
Pain is so personal, every loss hits us differently.

 I understand when you feel puzzled and angry when you hear statements like “i understand what you are going through”

 Or the resentment from untimely statements like “its God’s plan or the Lord gives and takes away” 

I understand the blank stare you give such people as you wonder whether they will ever understand the void this loss has caused you, the plans unmet or the good times you will never share. And don’t get me wrong, they mean well. But sometimes just a big hug and being there speak louder than the words.

I wish i could take away the pain but i cant!!

You are going to have days of anger, and moments where every breathe feels like someone is tightening a corset will all their might and everything within you is shrinking. But those days and moments will pass.

Cry as hard as you can for its from grieving that healing begins.

But most of all, just know that i am always a text away whenever you want to talk or vent your frustration.