I wish i had taken you by the shoulders and told you everything i needed you to hear before you left but i told myself every night afterwards as i curled up in bed that i’ll tell you everything when you come back yet i’m not 100% certain you are.
Crissi Jami wrote that “An over-indulgence of anything, even something as pure as water, can intoxicate”
Whenever i had a hard time sleeping, i would read a book or my bible. Problem was that sometimes i would doze off before putting the book away and end up tearing or folding the pages (most of which were borrowed books). I resorted to listening to poetry or narratives from people like Maya Angelou, Gwendolyn Brook and the like.Best discovery ever because within a few minutes i would drift off to sleep.
However this didn’t last long. I was sold!! The more i listened, the more i would want to know how the story ended, spend time musing about richness in lines in a poem or analyzing the hidden meaning of outstanding phrases.
Before i knew it, the one thing that helped me sleep kept me up. This got me thinking, what are those other things i have allowed to occupy my thoughts and what impact do they have in my life?
It has been a long hard year for me. But i am still here and i can afford to smile every morning! I am really thankful for that.
What are you grateful for?
Today i braved checking on a friend who lost someone so dear to them after playing hide and seek for almost two weeks.Its wasn’t out of lack of empathy but death is one topic i never ever want to discuss. No one does!!!
I spent half the time of my journey thinking about what to say and what not to say. The last thing one wants to hear are statements like He gives and takes away, i know how you feel…. and all those smart words we tend to say (with good intentions by the way). But pain is so personal and i didn’t want to sound like i was downplaying someone’s grief.
I was greeted with a long tight hug that dissolved all the brave thoughts i had accumulated along the way. I went blank and when i opened my mouth, i cheerfully said, “Let us bake a nice chocolate cake :oops:” Thats all i could think of.
Dumb as that sounds, cake saved the day. We played loud music, danced and talked about lots of things but death. I felt really happy when she said its the first time she hasn’t felt low since she returned, yey!!!
I have come to realise that joy comes from places you least expect it. It’s usually the simple things, like watching the sunset, listening to someone share their epic moments or even baking cake 😉